Why Counter Blox Is BAD!

Published 07.03.2020

Why Counter Blox Is BAD!

Blog Contest Winner - boris#9964

Hey you! Yes, you. Do you like getting very frustrated at things out of your control? Do you really love losing because there is an unstoppable exploiter problem due to roblox’s ability to have infinite accounts? I have got the game for you! Welcome to the world of Counter Blox! (otherwise known as the worst game ROLVe has made. Including Silly Simulator and unfinished RPGs!) In this game, you fight as counter-terrorists or against them as terrorists. The terrorists are working to plant the bomb inside one of two bomb sites within the time limit, but if that’s too complex don’t worry. No one ever plants. Ever. The counter-terrorists are working to stop the bomb from being planted within the time limit, but no one ever sits at the bomb sites anyhow. They always rush mid (and die immediately). If this sounds like another game made by a similar sounding developer group, it’s completely by accident, Counter Blox is only similar to Counter Strike in name. And maybe objectives, also weapons, and maps, and player models (the best you can get on roblox). But wait, the skin names are different, even if they look eerily similar. But that would be illegal, right? No one would ever copy the success of another game onto a different platform and hide behind the reluctance of the platform owner to remove a key money earner unless faced with a direct lawsuit. Now that the boring is out of the way, we can get into the game experience. You’re going to want to buy the AWP and sit in doorways or openings in one of the two maps that ever get played. These maps being Seaside and Dust II. And if someone kills you, you are really going to need to press m to open up a menu where you can move your mouse freely, and then 9 to open up the votekick menu. Once you have this menu open, you click on the name of the person who killed you and say “hacks,” in chat, even if you know full well they aren’t. If the AWP isn’t working so well, try a shotty, the best being the Sawed Off. Now that you have your trusty shotgun, you are free to sit in a corner behind a well traveled place, as even good players rarely check corners. When you get called out in chat for camping, just reply something like, “get gud,” or anything to the same degree of toxicity. If these strats are too boring, pick up the mp5(sd) and rush one of the bomb sites 30 seconds after everyone else, you aren’t baiting your teammates out, you’re catching the enemy off guard. Around this time is usually when the first hacker joins, they can’t do anything until the next round. Once you easily strafe left and right to avoid the shots of your enemies and crush them, you get instantly knifed from the enemies spawn. Votekick them out of there (m+9) like I mentioned previously. Once the hacker is gone after four rounds of bringing the losing enemy team up to seven points, it is incredibly important that you sit in your respective spawn with an M249, which you’ve acquired through the heavy tab in the buy menu (same place as shotguns). It is even more important you listen for footsteps as no one walks, once someone walks close enough, aim at the wall they’re behind. Unbeknownst to you, you’re getting flamed in the dead chat. Once someone randomly wallbangs you with an AWP, they start flaming you in the chat you can see. Your team joins in since you’ve just lost the meaningless game wherein the other team was boosted, but no one pays attention to that. Skins. Skins are the reason most people say they play, “oh I’ve just gotten a nice skin, I can’t quit.” Reality is, they like the easy stomping this game provides. Ignoring this and taking their pitiful comments at face value, yes, there are skins. You are going to focus on getting a karambit, and should occasionally sink a few robux into getting one (if you’re a pro CB player). Once you receive your fiftieth Rose PX4, you buy your last case, getting a butterfly skin. It’s not a particularly pretty or cool skin, but it’s yours. Now you can get the occasional small talk about skins in more chill rounds, which are somewhat common, but it won’t be the first seven you play. Now once you’ve played this game for a couple of months (telling yourself you would quit almost every week) you finally get tired of getting lagkilled through walls or dying to hackers with scripts that have not been patched, despite existing for roughly two years. You will find yourself naturally switching to CS:GO, a much better game. Be excited, the last couple of months you’ve no-lifed CB have given you absolutely no experience, except for learning bad copies of maps. All of the strats I have mentioned will only be used by Silver I’s and unranked. Any of the playstyles you’ve spent hours crafting, have been rendered useless by a very mediocre copy of the game you are currently playing. So you grind CS:GO for a year or two, like any respectable player. You finally get to Gold Nova II, and ultimately hit a plateau in rankups. You remember a game on roblox, the one that led you to leaving roblox as a whole. You join up, appalled by the latency, the server having the consistency of a teenager going through moodswings. You easily destroy the entire other team, but die once to a jump in a poorly controlled spray. You almost rip your hair out watching your teammates, who either don’t speak your language, or can barely make cohesive english sentences. They refuse to play cooperatively, rushing and peeking AWPs, aiming at the ground, holding a corner that leads to nothing while the enemy drops down behind them (loudly) and stabs them 3 times. Even though you are disgusted by the tactics, you play CB for another couple of days before finally getting fed up with the “copy my work but change it so they don’t know,” version of the game you’ve played for years, all nostalgia wearing off soon. When you queue back into CS:GO you are delighted to see that your team actually has at least 7 brain cells all functioning in unison.